The Magic Machine Play

ENTREPRENEUR: I’ve been working on this idea for weeks and finally come up with these plans.

ENGINEER: This looks great. Do you really think it will work?

ENTREPRENEUR: I’m sure it will. There’s still a couple of little problems we’ll need to iron out.

ACCOUNTANT: That shouldn’t be too hard. Just get the right people to find the solution.

ENGINEER: I’ll need a bit of time to study the concept but, I think we can handle it.

ACCOUNTANT: This is going to be a real money spinner when we get it to market.

ENGINEER: Oh; I can see that. This will be a marvellous machine. It should work like magic.

ENTREPRENEUR: (Rolling up a plan and giving it to the Engineer) Here you are. Take this and have a close look at the idea then let me know what we need to get into production.

ENGINEER: Not a problem. I’ll get back to you shortly. (The Engineer goes off stage)

ENTREPRENEUR: I sent a copy of my plans to the University for their scientists to have a look.

ACCOUNTANT: When do you expect to hear from them?

ENTREPRENEUR: They were sending one of their people over today.

ENTREPRENEUR: That must be our scientist now.

ACCOUNTANT: I’ll go and see. (The Accountant goes off stage and comes back with the Scientist.)

ACCOUNTANT: (Introducing the Scientist to the Entrepreneur as they shake hands) This is Professor Lau from the University.

SCIENTIST: Nice to meet you. So, you are the inventor of this new machine?

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s right Professor. What do you think of the idea?

SCIENTIST: The idea is good except; it won’t work.

ACCOUNTANT: What do you mean; it won’t work. Of course it will work. It’s a marvellous invention.

SCIENTIST: It might be on paper but, have you actually built it?

ENTREPRENEUR: Not yet. Our Engineer is looking at it now to work out how we can get into production.

SCIENTIST: Well; according to Newton’s first law of motion; for every action there’s an equal and opposite reaction.

ENTREPRENEUR: What’s that got to do with my machine?

SCIENTIST: It just means it won’t work.

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s impossible. I’ve spent weeks working out the design and drawing all the detail plans.

SCIENTIST: And a nice lot of drawings they are, but that doesn’t mean the machine will work.

ACCOUNTANT: Is that the best you can come up with? That’s not very positive.

SCIENTIST: Sorry, but facts are facts.

ACCOUNTANT: I’m not sure we can accept that. I think we’ll have to get a second opinion.

ENTREPRENEUR: Yes; good thinking. We’re not interested in all that sort of negative stuff. We want positive facts; not negative ones.

SCIENTIST: The only positive fact I can give you is; it won’t work.

ACCOUNTANT: You mean to say you are going to charge us to tell us the idea is no good.

SCIENTIST: My word. This advice will save you a lot of money in research and production.

ENTREPRENEUR: No, that’s not what we want to hear. We’ll get another opinion.

ACCOUNTANT: You can send us your account but don’t expect an early payment.

SCIENTIST: That’s not very businesslike. Another opinion is going to give you the same answer and you’ll just waste more money.

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s our problem. Thank you for what you’ve done. Our Accountant will show you to the door.

ACCOUNTANT: Well, that was a bit of a waste of time.

ENTREPRENEUR: It was. but I guess you can’t expect much else from those scientific types. They get too wound up in facts and don’t have enough vision.

ACCOUNTANT: It’s a bit the same in my profession. Some accountants are too tied up with figures and can’t see the creative side of Accounting.

ENTREPRENEUR: Oh, I agree. One always needs to be creative and, especially so, with accounting.

ACCOUNTANT: I’ll go and get the Engineer and we can see what he thinks.

ENTREPRENEUR: Yes; do that. I’ll have a look at the plans again.

ENTREPRENEUR: Come in.

ENTREPRENEUR: (Addressing the Engineer) Well, have you had a chance to study the drawings?

ENGINEER: Yes, and I have gone over them with the Workshop Supervisor.

ENTREPRENEUR: And, what do you think?

ENGINEER: As you pointed out before, there are a couple of small problems that need to be sorted out.

ACCOUNTANT: Yes, we know that. But, what do you think about the machine?

ENGINEER: It’s a fine machine and they are really beautiful drawings.

ENTREPRENEUR: (Addressing the Workshop Supervisor) So, when can we get into production?

SUPERVISOR: Well, we’ll need to build a prototype first.

ACCOUNTANT: Why? You have the plans and you say they’re good plans. Why do we need a prototype?

SUPERVISOR: Well, there’s a couple of small problems that need sorting out.

ENTREPRENEUR: Yes, we know. That’s what we pay you for; to sort out the problems and find the solutions.

ENGINEER: Yeah, we know that. We just think we need to build a prototype first to make sure everything is operational.

ACCOUNTANT: The Scientist from the University said there was a problem with some guy named Newton.

ENGINEER: I think he may have been referring to Newton’s Law.

ACCOUNTANT: Why; is Newton a lawyer?

SUPERVISOR: No, he’s not a lawyer. He was a scientist.

ENTREPRENEUR: What do you mean – was? Is he dead?

SUPERVISOR: Yes. He died a couple of hundred years ago.

ACCOUNTANT: You mean he’s some old fogey who’s dead and gone?

ENGINEER: Well; yes. He’s dead and gone but, he was quite a brilliant man in his day.

ENTREPRENEUR: Well; there’s been a lot of water under the bridge since then so; brilliant or not; what’s he got to do with modern day inventions?

SUPERVISOR: He did a lot of experiments and came up with some basic laws.

ACCOUNTANT: So, he is a lawyer?

ENGINEER: No! What he worked on was Physics.

ENTREPRENEUR: We’re not into physics; we’re talking about a machine.

SUPERVISOR: Well, Physics includes the Laws of Motion.

ACCOUNTANT: But our machine is stationary.

ENGINEER: Yes; that’s true; the machine will be stationary but, it will have moving parts.

ENTREPRENEUR: So; what’s the problem?

SUPERVISOR: There seems to be a small problem with the way the various moving parts move!

ACCOUNTANT: That’s ridiculous! Moving parts move and that’s all there is to it.

ENGINEER: Not exactly.

ENTREPRENEUR: What do you mean – not exactly?

ENGINEER: Well, whenever something moves there’s an equal and opposite reaction.

ACCOUNTANT: That’s what the Professor said. What’s that got to do with our machine?

SUPERVISOR: Well; what we think is; the design won’t really work efficiently the way it is drawn.

ENGINEER: And that’s why we suggest building a prototype first; to sort out these little problems.

ENTREPRENEUR: So, you think you can improve on my design and make it better?

ENGINEER: No. That’s not exactly what we meant. You’ve got a wonderful design here and some really great drawings.

ENTREPRENEUR: But; there’s a few little problems with it?

SUPERVISOR: Yes – exactly. You’ve hit the nail on the head.

ENTREPRENEUR: Be careful I don’t hit you on the head.

ACCOUNTANT: So: what’s it going to take to solve these problems?

ENGINEER: Once we build a prototype, and do some research, we’ll be in a better position to see what needs to be done.

ACCOUNTANT: How much research are you talking about?

SUPERVISOR: That’s hard to say. It may take a while.

ACCOUNTANT: And cost a lot of money?

ENGINEER: Well, all new ideas cost money to prove them.

ENTREPRENEUR: But you’ve got the plans; why do you need research?

SUPERVISOR: It’s those little problems, you see?

ENTREPRENEUR: No, I don’t see. I’ve been working on this idea for weeks and drawn all these detail plans. What else do you need?

ENGINEER: Yeah; the drawings are great but, there’s this little problem with the design.

ENTREPRENEUR: What? Are you saying my design is no good?

SUPERVISOR: No, we’re not saying that. It’s a great design and a wonderful idea but; it needs a little adjustment.

ACCOUNTANT: Why?

SUPERVISOR: To make it wor……… I mean - to make it better.

ENTREPRENEUR: Were you going to say; to make it work?

ENGINEER: What we mean is; to make it work better.

ENTREPRENEUR: OK. What’s this small problem you keep talking about?

ENGINEER: It’s to do with Newton’s Law.

ACCOUNTANT: Not that old fogey again?

SUPERVISOR: I’m afraid so. What he discovered were, what are called, Universal Laws.

ACCOUNTANT: What is that? Like International Law?

ENGINEER: No. He discovered certain Laws of Physics that apply to everything.

ENTREPRENEUR: No Laws can apply to everything.

SUPERVISOR: What we mean is; everything that moves.

ACCOUNTANT: That sounds weird to me.

ENGINEER: Actually, Newton’s first Law is fairly simple.

ACCOUNTANT: How many Laws does he have?

SUPERVISOR: Oh, there were lots of different Laws he discovered.

ENTREPRENEUR: You mean he made them up? He found them somewhere and just wrote about them?

ENGINEER: No, he didn’t just make them up. He discovered them from experiments.

ACCOUNTANT: But you said he found these laws a couple of hundred years ago. They must be old fashioned by now?

ENGINEER: Universal Laws don’t go out of fashion; they’ve been here forever.

ENTREPRENEUR: Nothing last forever. Maybe, we’d better find some new Laws to make my machine work.

SUPERVISOR: It doesn’t work that way.

ENTREPRENEUR: Why not? If you say this old guy found a Law that stops my machine from working; why can’t we find a new Law to make it work?

ENGINEER: You’d need to be a magician to make that happen.

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s what we want; a magic machine.

ACCOUNTANT: That’s right. That’s exactly what we want. Where can we find a new Law to make it work?

ENGINEER: You can’t.

ENTREPRENEUR: Don’t give me that. There’s always a way. What’s this Law you are having so much trouble with?

SUPERVISOR: It’s Newton’s first Law of motion.

ACCOUNTANT: What’s it say?

ENGINEER: It says; for each action there’s an equal and opposite reaction.

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s a pretty simple Law. We should be able to straighten it out.

SUPERVISOR: What do you mean; straighten it out? It is what it is.

ACCOUNTANT: You got to be a bit creative here. Think outside the square.

ENGINEER: What are you talking about?

ENTREPRENEUR: Well, if that Law doesn’t make our machine work what do we need to do to change something?

SUPERVISOR: You can’t just change a Law like that.

ENTREPRENEUR: No. We’ll discover a new one. Now - let’s see.

ACCOUNTANT: I’ve got it. Let’s change the ‘an’ to ‘no.’

ENGINEER: What are you talking about?

ACCOUNTANT: Instead of – for each action there’s an equal and ….

ENTREPRENEUR: That’s brilliant. That’s exactly what we want.

SUPERVISOR: I don’t understand. What do you mean?

ENTREPRENEUR: For each action there’s NO equal and opposite reaction. See; we’ve solved the problem for you.

ENGINEER: Well, if you think you can make your machine work by changing the Law then you will really have a Magic Machine.

ENTREPRENEUR: Come on; let’s get to the workshop and put this new Law into action.

ENGINEER: Is this guy a Magician or are we all just plain crazy?